The Ultimate Marriage Question

Let me ask you this – how long have you been married or with your significant other?  Do you still sleep together in the marriage bed?  Do you wish you could sleep in a separate bed sometimes?

Okay, so maybe that’s more than just one question – but the reason I ask is this.  John and I have been married/together now for almost 8 years (wow, in 5 days it’ll be 8 years!).  He snores, and I’m a light sleeper.  When Alyssa lived in Halifax her room had the daybed in it and if I’d wake up to John snoring I’d just sneak into her room and sleep the rest of the night there.  She moved home and I lost my ‘go to bed’ .. so now I’m not getting very good sleeps.

Then Taylor moves back in with his mother!  OMG now there’s an empty double bed … in my new Scentsy office … so not only is it comfortable, it smells AMAZING in here!

Which leads me back to my questions because the other night when I was sleeping, John starts kicking me … not on purpose … but his back is starting to get bad and I think he has these auto reflex things happening so he kept waking me.  I put up with it for the night.  The next night, however, I told him “I think I’ll sleep in the spare bedroom” … he’s like, “omg Roz I was just going to suggest the same thing and I’d sleep there” … but he says this room spooks him so I told him I’d sleep there.

OMG it was the best sleep I’ve had in a LONG time … and he came in around 6:30am when he got up for work to let me know he’s up I can go back to our bed now.  I asked him how he slept and he said “great”.  I’d be lying if I said that upset me … my insides were jumping up and down because I was thinking I’m finally going to get some sleep around here.

Is that such a bad thing?  I mean, John and I saw 4 kids through puberty (they were 10, 12, 13 and 14) … and everyone made it … alive … we’ve been through the drugs, bullying, anger issues, therapy (for the 4 of them at one point or another), sexual orientations, gender identity questions, 3 graduations, one dropout … the list is endless and the reason I originally created this blog to begin with – the fun never ended (read that with the heaviest of sarcasm please!).  John and I very rarely fight, if at all … and on top of it all, dealing with exes …

We are finally at that stage where we can focus on each other … and this sleeping in separate beds thing comes up.  We both agree it works fine … but is that going to lead to something worse?  I used to think ma and da sleeping in separate bedrooms was weird, but I completely understand why now!


I would SO love to hear people’s feedback/comments on the subject … I watched Dr Oz one day last week and he had something on there about sleeping in separate beds – his conclusion was after he tested a couple of people, that they tossed and turned just as often as they did with their spouse … I find that hard to believe … the other night I got a full 6 hours – midnight-6am – without waking up!  I’m usually awake at 2am, 4am, 5am, etc … but to sleep 6 hours in a row – I completely disagreed with Dr Oz.


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