How To Deal with Aging Parents

I am currently dealing with aging parents.  I mean, really, they’re not that old, but they’re getting up there.  Along with aging parents, come their siblings.  My mother is currently taking care of her sister, Ollie – who is 75 years old and not well.  She’s been back and forth to the hospital for the past few months and it’s really wearing my mother out.  She’s by her side all of the time.  From the moment she’s up in the morning she’s getting ready to drive into the hospital, comes home to make supper for dad, and then goes back into the hospital for the night.  This is a constant thing happening EVERY day, with no break.

my siblings, my parents and I

I find this very commendable, but I miss my mother.  Is that selfish of me?  She’s never there when I call, she’s never on her iPad for a text chat, and she never stops by to visit – or when she does she’s in a hurry so I see her for literally seconds.  It’s not good for her health and one trip home from the hospital almost landed her in the hospital – her hernia near exploded when her car stalled in the middle of the road and she had to slam on the breaks!  I’d like my mother to slow down so she’ll be around for much longer .. also selfish of me?  Well, I’ll admit then I’m selfish.

my girls and their nannie and papa

I have two sisters and I love them dearly – well, half the time I feel like we’re not as close as sisters are, but that’s because we are quite opposite type people and don’t share the same opinions and ideas about things.  Yes, we fight, but I’m sure when push comes to shove, we’d be there for each other.  When we get older and it’s our time to take care of each other, I am pretty certain I won’t forget I have children or grandchildren (hopefully).  I get that fact that mom is scared she’s losing her sister … I would be too … but she’s not God and she can’t do everything, she’s just not that young anymore.  Alyssa’s graduating next Friday and I have made many attempts to contact my mother to remind her so she could send a card up .. I called dad and asked him to remind her, but he’s getting just as forgetful as she is.  I tried calling her tonight and there was no answer so I left a voice message.  Francine, my older sister, called me to tell me SHE was on the phone with her and mom told her she’ll “call you later, she’s trying to get ready to go see Ollie”.  Ugh … really??

I don’t know how to feel – angry, frustrated, jealous, or selfish … because I’m feeling a little bit of all of it.  I just want my mother back before it’s too late.